A coworker of mine expressed his relief that, although his teenage son was caught looking at inappropriate things on the internet, at least he wasn't looking at naked men...
And I had a thought...
For all of you who feel this way, here's how to make sure you never hear your child say that he or she is gay. -Remind them often that homosexuality is bad. It's a crime against nature. If you're religious at all remind them that God hates gays. Homosexuality is a crime against God! Repeat this often enough that they know how important their "straightness" is to you. Punish them for watching TV shows portraying gays as "normal". Refuse to allow them to hang out with kids who may be gay. Make them know that your pride rests on their sexual prefrence.
That way, if they are gay, maybe they'll kill themselves before your friends find out.
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